Pastor Melinda Giese, Summit UMC
One of my joys in pre-COVID life was planning vacations. I love to research all my options, spending hours reading Rick Steves’ travel books and Trip Advisor reviews on everything from attractions to restaurants to lodging. I like to find out which sights are a must-see and where to find a great bakery. If there are 240 online reviews of a hotel I’m considering staying at, I will read all of them. By the time I’m done, I will be able to tell you everything you ever wanted to know about the hotel’s plumbing, mattresses, and noise issues. While this level of planning certainly does not appeal to everyone, I get to enjoy the trip twice – once in the planning and a second time in the trip itself.
This June, my husband and I had planned to celebrate our 20th anniversary by taking a family trip to London and Paris with our two teenagers, Jonathan and Anna. Jonathan will graduate high school next year, and we thought this could be our last chance to take a family trip like this. I held off on taking much vacation over the last year, so I could take a full ten days right at the end of my appointment year. I planned obsessively last summer; we worked out plans with family input; we got passports for the kids; I made reservations and bought plane tickets for the four of us.
Of course, as a result of COVID-19, I’ve since had to undo every one of the reservations I made. This week, I just submitted my last request for a refund on a prior reservation. In the scope of things, I’m fully aware these are small things to give up compared with the sacrifices so many people are making in essential and high-risk jobs right now. Some health care providers have sent their children away to keep them safe, others in essential and high-risk jobs have lost their lives.
But even as I recognize the far greater sacrifices around me, I’m still sad. Our canceled trip falls into the category of disappointments like missed graduations, quarantine birthday parties, and postponed weddings. We grieve these missed opportunities to celebrate life together. I know that you are grieving small and large losses in your own lives as well – missed gatherings with grandchildren and grandparents, job losses, delayed memorial services, plans you had to cancel, family weddings and reunions that have been postponed to later dates.
In my own life, I appreciate the wisdom of Ecclesiastes 3:1,4, ”For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:… a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.” While grief won’t last forever, we still need time to mourn. The courage it takes to face our losses ultimately helps us much more than ignoring them. When you are feeling grief, I’d encourage you to name your own places of sadness either silently or out loud in prayer. Acknowledging our losses and offering these situations to God’s care helps us to accept them.
God promises to meet us in each season of our lives, right where we’re at. There’s no reason to pretend; God loves and accepts our full selves exactly as we are. Whether we experience a season of mourning or dancing, God’s presence surrounds us. And in our grief as much as in our joy, we can count on God’s love to see us through. This season won’t last forever. But as we journey through it, we can invite God into our lives as they are, trusting that God will bring peace and comfort to all our places of grief.